Previous column failed in reviewing bad 'Skulls' Reviewing movies that you haven't seen based solely on the previews is an inexact science. Although modern previews usually give away at least 90 percent of a movie's plot, that other 10 percent sometimes makes all the difference.

That's why, every so often, it is necessary to look back on some old reviews and take them to task. After seeing the full movie, was the initial review correct? If so, what are the socio-cultural implications of such standardized and formulaic publicity vehicles? Are we becoming a society of bloated consumers, unthinkingly digesting the pre-chewed, nutritionless stodge that Hollywood and corporate America feeds us? And if the preview review somehow failed to hit the mark, why did this happen?

The first edition of this column contained a review of "The Skulls." The only way to discover the accuracy of said review was to view this apparently worthless film firsthand.

The original review of "The Skulls" read, in part, "'Skulls' (also known as cliché no. 8) is the story of an innocent and honest youngster who gets caught up in the malicious intrigues of a powerful and secretive organization." While factually accurate, this review was misleading. It did not once mention how horrible this movie turned out to be, nor did it adequately dissuade readers from wasting their valuable time, money and brain cells on this movie.

"The Skulls" thus far holds the title of "Worst 'Haven't Seen It' movie of the year." The worthlessness of this movie knew no bounds. From the acting to the plot line to the soundtrack, "The Skulls" just couldn't do anything right.

Not that it matters, but the film is the story of Luke, a boy poor in finances but rich in spirit, who joins an elite secret society known as the Skulls. Members sit in tiny cages together, drug innocent young boys, partner off to share their most intimate secrets and engage in various other homoerotic activities. Someone dies, and the Skulls cover it up. Young Luke sets out on a quest to uncover the truth, risking everything the Skulls have given him, including $120,000, a new car, acceptance to law school with a full scholarship and beautiful hookers.

Luke learns the truth, gets the girl, cries a lot, fights a duel and begins a movement to reform the Skulls. The only cliché missing from this movie is a gratuitous scene in which Luke travels to New York and paints the town red, to the tune of "I Want to be a Part of It." They must be saving that for the sequel.